Friday 10 October 2014

Cosmetic Splurgery

I have a big announcement: I've had my first cosmetic "work" done and I have been documenting the process.  Before you jump to boobs conclusions, let me give you a hint...
Some people were still hoping for boobs.
Sorry, instead I present porcelain veneers.

As I may have mentioned over and over, I'm now 40.  SHOCKING, I know.  It snuck right up on me.  It seems to me that as we women get older, our "options" of how to take care of ourselves expand.  Let's assume we're settled into our careers and family life (as if that's a small feat), and our homes are under control (bwahahahahaha)... with all our "extra" time, we have hair manis pedis brows facials veins under-eye-circles lip-creases bone-density thinning-skin sleep and of course, the usual diet and exercise to consider.  And that's if everything is going well.  It's downright overwhelming.  In the 5 minutes a day that I might have time to consider these things, what shall I choose?  Of all our cosmetic options, what is worth it?  What makes a woman beautiful and youthful and stylish and ... ageless?  My answer to that question is: her smile.  

Don't get me wrong, I don't think a smile has to be cosmetically perfected to be beautiful.  Nope, perfection is overrated and boring.  I think you just have to smile and that's what I've been doing for my 40 years.

I don't only smile with my daughter or at wineries.
These are just nice toothy examples of my "before" smile.

My smile reflects relationships, my heart, kindness, love, laughter!  When words fail, a genuine smile will do and for that reason, I've never let my dark left front tooth stop me from smiling.  However, I was always aware of it, and this summer I decided to address it.  First up, I needed to whiten my teeth which took two weeks to do and two weeks to cure.  That makes me sound like meat.
I took my whitening kit to Yellowstone.
Here I am hanging out creek side, wondering what I would do if a bear came upon me all by my lonesome.

After that, I had gum surgery to even out the gum line, and thus began several hours of dental chair visits AND an audience for my summer humour.  Someone should have warned them.

Left: immediate post op (that sounds very medical)
Middle: still frozen (AKA my best Anthro-model look yet)
Right: almost healed.

My favourite part of gum surgery was when my awesome dentist Dr. Bernard pushed my teeth into my brains, a supposedly necessary maneuver.  That was swell.  That's why I was *ecstatic* to learn I needed a second gum surgery to get things just right. 
That right there is a look of self-pity, for gum surgery #2 was exponentially worse.
I comforted myself with expensive t-shirts and blender drinks.

After the recommended two-weeks of healing and strict Siberian Protocol, I went in for my temporary veneer mid-September with a strange horizontal gum line.  FINE, I'm not a dentist and maybe a morning vodka rinse is NOT a good idea.  (kidding)  Turns out I had a gum infection and needed a round of Gryffindor antibiotics to fix me up.
Penicillin is so much more interesting when you imagine wizarding side-effects.
The dental office asked if I could send a selfie of my healed gums... uh, have we met?

Next up, it was time for my temporary veneer AKA getting needles in my gums again, but totally worth it.
Such a huge improvement already.
Oh, and note my LOW-gum-line-smile, Dr. B.... BOO YAH.  It's possible. Not probable but possible.
 OTs are good at compensatory strategies for daily occupations.  I call this my "coping" collage.

I headed off to Ontario with my temporary veneer with a mild worry that I would somehow lose my temp and be stuck with a pirate-tooth stump whilst trying to be all professional and learned and stuff.  Fortunately, that never came to pass and I returned home ready for my permanent smile.
That's me holding my body up by my eyebrows, as Kim Barthel would tell me.
I'm *totally* relaxed.
 Just so's you know, you CAN take a selfie during dental work.

Well, I did NOT get my porcelain veneer that day.  It wasn't quite right...  I loved it when Dr. B asked my opinion on the matter.  "Uhhhh.  How can I say this, I see a tooth.  It's not dark.  I'm happy."  But I trusted his opinion and that I wasn't being a bother by sending it back to the lab.  (if nothing else made me sound old till now, that just did)  Second temporary veneer, another week and back to the chair.  That was yesterday and Dr. B brought the lab to me for any last minute adjustments, and not just any lab, Beata's lab all the way from Calgary.  I so wish I would have insisted on a photo with her, but let me just tell you, I knew right away Beata was awesome because she was wearing orange pants.  She shared life wisdom, an expert second-opinion on the veneer options and offered to run for wine sustenance in case of emergency.  That that even came up is more evidence of awesome.  Short story long, I now have my final porcelain veneer and can't stop smiling!  But before I reveal, let me explain one more thing - why I'm blogging about this.

I am part of a Splurge Sorority.  We are 12 women who contribute $40 each month then take turns "splurging" on something just for us.  First round, was way back before I started thrifting and I used my Splurge money for clothes.  Second round, I used my Splurge money for Anthro bedding.  This round, I'm using my Splurge money for my smile.  Since the porcelain veneer is considered cosmetic, it is not covered by my benefits and is therefore the perfect Splurge!  I gathered the girls for a night of cosmetic splurgery... not botox or group lipo or anything exciting like that.  Instead I went to Sephora, found *the* masks as recommended by the 25yo claiming to have wrinkles telling me to fill in my brows and aghast that I don't wash my face at night, then shared them with my friends...
Nobody said beauty is pretty.
During and after.  
I think I look at least 39 after.

Even though I couldn't reveal my final veneer at my Splurge party, we had a great night and all enjoyed some extra-special pampering.

AND NOW, the moment we've all been waiting for... 
Dr. Bernard said I should wait to take photos.  I totally ignored that advice because I'm an excellent patient that *needed* to blog.  But the gist of it is that the porcelain veneer will only look better over time.  

I can't say THANK YOU enough to Dr. Bernard and his assistant Louise for all their time and expertise!!  I can't imagine going through all this without having fun - thanks for making it fun!  
They even let me take a selfie with my "teeth team" - now that is awesome!


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